It's all over now...

Bethanny Anne Lough (Jessica Meyers) March 19, 1982 - October 2, 2009.

Rest in peace, sweet Beth. Our thoughts goes to your friend Jesse who will now have to go on living without you until the day you are reunited.

Update: Beth's heart has stopped and her condition is critical

Yes, I realize that you want to read about other things and that that's why you came here. Forgive me but I simply cannot think of anything else but Beth right now. I know it may feel a bit strange to pray for the life of somebody you never met or don't know. No, I have never met Beth, either. We only know each other through Facebook. The latest reports from more than three hours ago says she is supported by a breathing machine and her heart has stopped twice. So please concentrate all your thoughts and prayers on her recovery. I am praying for good news soon.

My blog will get back to normal very soon but right now I ask you to join me in focusing on Beth's recovery. Let's make a miracle happen.

Pray for Beth - she needs it right now!

One of my Facebok friends, the lovely Beth Lough, is at the moment in hospital in a critical condition after a serious car accident. According to her FB page it's updated by a friend who gives us updates on Beth's condition. Please join me in focusing all of your energy, positive thoughts and prayers on her recovery so she can come home to her loved ones very soon. Faith can work miracles. Thank you all.

What’s the point of punishing a masochist?

Something which is always up for discussion is how a d/s relationship should be. Some of us are relying on written slave contracts which of course may add some extra excitement to the relationship. Others just go along more freely and develop their relationship as they go along. But is it really necessary that a ‘punishment’ should be a negative experience for the sub/slave? If I get a kick out of being whipped, would a proper punishment be just to deprive me of the kiss of the whip? I get the distinct feeling that many are trying to live up to what a relationship between slave and Master should be, based on various books and writings. Just like somebody into religion will try to find the truth in the Bible or in the Koran instead of going into themselves and see what works for them personally. I mean, we all have God/the Power/the Energy or whatever you call it within us, haven’t we?

In our relationship both me and my Master get a kick out of playing and living out our fantasies and it adds such immense enjoyment to our sex life that I can hardly describe it. True, it happens that Master gives me explicit orders not to come for a long time. The strategy is to keep me in a constant state of arousal without being allowed to climax. But the effect of this will be that I will get even more aroused in the process and when I am finally allowed to unleash all the passions and lust which have been building up with in me, my orgasms will be so much more intense and I can keep on climaxing again and again until I feel I’m about to pass out. Master’s strategy of denying me to climax is a means to an end and not actually a pounsihment for making me suffer. The same goes for hard whippings and canings. Yes, it hurts like hell. But in the process an uncontrollable heat will build up within me as my endorphine level is rising, a heat which takes over my body and my mind. It simply gives me an enormous kick, new energy and happiness. Many of you have been there, my friends. You know perfectly well what subspace is all about, when you drift onto the higher level and feel so good you can hardly understand it. I suppose the same thing can be achieved by drugs (it must - why would otherwise so many use them and burn their brains out in the process?).

For me and Master our relationship, our playing and our fantasies is a source of energy and happiness. It’s like opening the door to the other side, to a new wonderful world. In contrast to drugs this has no negative side effects as long as you do play it safe – and that’s where I realize that it could go wrong for many. I cannot stress enough how important it is to read each other, to learn how to feel your partner and her/his reactions.What do you think? What is bdsm and d/s to you? Is it a roleplay according to some determined rules or doy you live it the way me and Master do? Must a punishment be a negative experience for the slave? It will be interesting to hear your thoughts on this. Take care and play safe, tina

Smile - and the world smiles with you!

It's a great sunny day here in Stockholm and I really feel inspired. How about you? Sure we have all have work and other things hanging over us. Yet everything feels so much easier when you have your dreams and fantasies with you all the time and are looking forward to something nice. Something exciting. Yes, you can fill every day with exciting moments and the most tedious of tasks will all of a sudden become a piece of cake. Everything gets easier if you look upon it with a positive attitude. Yes, my sinful lusty dreams will take me smiling through what would otherwise have been a very boring day.

I hope your day will be a good one, too. Just think of something nice. As you have come here I can well imagine what you'd like to dream about :-) Do it! If your dreams are really vivid and accompanied by a burning desire they will become reality. Who will you meet today? Smile at him/her. Give fate a chance. Your love may be just a smile away.

hugs, tina

Some thoughts on d/s relationships

One of my Facebook friends, the lovely Miss Kelsie of San Francisco, California has been kind enough to share her thoughts on d/s relationships. Thank you, Miss Kelsie. And naturally all your comments on this are welcome. The following text is by Miss Kelsie.

I am a Domme, but have been a sub in the past. I know what is like to choose to submit to another woman, as well as what it is like to provide another woman with the discipline and direction she desires.

Domination and submission provide exciting play for many of us. But what sometimes get lost in the play are the ideas that should guide the interactions between the Domme and her sub.

To the sub, the discipline required by her Domme should be a source of comfort, confidence, and strength. You may have had a bad day at work. Perhaps others are not being nice to you. But a sub can always point to the tasks she has carried out for her Domme with pride. “Today was horrible at work, but at least I was able to succeed in serving my Mistress.” By carrying out her mistresses orders (no matter how demeaning those orders might sound to others), a sub is building her confidence that she really can do something right.

Some subs are powerful executives who choose to submit as a stress relief and because they feel the calling. Other subs wander as they look to make their way in life. By choosing to submit and giving the Domme control over part of her life, a sub is freeing herself up to do better job in the rest of her world with her school, work, and friends. Her need for solidity, discipline, and achievement will be met by successfully carrying out her Dom’s instructions. Given this solidity, the subs will be better able to deal with the uncertainties and difficulties she will face in the rest of their lives.

Some think of the Domme as being mean to the sub. That is far from the truth. The best Dommes care for their subs and want them to be happy and lead successful lives. Dommes provide their subs with discipline and order. It is true that many of the demands Dommes make upon their sub will be embarrassing, humiliating, or painful. But the point is not that the Domme is doing mean things to the sub. The point is that the sub is choosing to submit to someone she respects and who she thinks can provide her with the guidance and discipline that will make the rest of her life better.

I believe domination and submission works better in the electronic world than in the physical world. In the physical world nothing is ever perfect. Like watching a movie made from a book you loved, physical domination doesn’t turn out to be exactly what you had pictured it being in your mind.

Online, your Domme and your sub are exactly what you want them to be. The play becomes ideal. If you are the Domme you imagine your instructions being followed in the manner which gives you the most pleasure. If you are a sub you imagine the perfect Domme guiding your actions. No real world Domme or subs could ever live up the ideals in people’s minds.

For this reason, I do not confuse the physical and online worlds. I do no physical meets, no webcams, and no phone calls. Doing these confuses the purity available online with the less perfect reality of the physical world.

Also, the Domme should remain a mystery to her subs. Familiarity breeds contempt. Both the Domme role and the sub role should be valued and respected, but they are different. It is perfectly reasonable for the Domme to demand intimate details of the sub’s life. The Domme requires this knowledge to fine tune her orders to her sub. But it is highly inappropriate for the sub to request the same of her Dom. If she does so she will begin to see the Domme as her pal, rather than as someone who rightly can and should provide the sub with the discipline she craves in her life.

The relationship between a sub and her Domme is a private one. There will be no sharing with others on facebook or elsewhere what happens between the two. This intimate relationship is for their pleasure, not the world’s entertainment.
Miss Kelsey

Golden showers

One of my faithful blog followers and friends just asked me about golden showers. Well, Scipio, I have written about this before: just check out http://tinaslut.blogspot.com/2008/05/i-just-spoke-to-man-on-bondage-mirc.html I will surely get back to the matter soon. love, tina