I am back at home now and as it is very quiet around here today, I have kept on trashing myself quite a bit. My bottom was very sore and swollen when I got back home and I must strike even harder to achieve the desired result as my skin gets rough from all the trashing. But now I seem to have got the right touch when striking as one welt after another splits open so that blood appears. This excites me very much and makes me want to strike even harder until blood runs down my thighs. I brought a few very sturdy, sharp switches with me home when I left the cabin and they are obviously perfect for the job - very flexible and almost impossible to break. After laying in a salt solution over night they really sting like fire... mmmmmmmmm
I keep on laying on the strokes as hard as I can but it seems that all the time I perfect my technique with every stroke and the results are vivid marks on my slut bottom. Now and then I have to take a rest for catching my breath and masturbate. Yes, I am soooo horny now! I am a painslut in heat who is obsessed with the stinging switches that burns so wonderfully as they bite deep into my flesh... oh, such a gorgeous feeling! I keep on whipping myself so hard that I get dizzy and almost feel like fainting but after a few minutes rest I am fit for fight again.
Please, my unknown visitor, leave a comment and tell me a little about yourself and what attracts you about this blog. I would very much like to know you.
Back to the whipping now... mmmmmmmmmmm
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9 comments:
Tina,
Lucky me, I stumbled upon your blog. I'm a complete novice to the wonderful world of S&M, but I do know that where my interests lie.
Sadism is what excites me. I love reading your posts and feeling the powerful lust that generates from your sinful desires.
What I hope is to gain a foot into my own mind of fantasies and devilish desires. Introduce me into your world of pain.
This, is a state of mind that I posses and cannot deny. How could I possibly continue with the feeling of isolation.
You seem to lead a normal life, even with your alternative lifestyle. I desperately yearn to submit myself to my sadistic needs.
-Tai
Bon jour Tina,
First off, i have no interest in pain and derive no pleasure from it. With that being said, i have to let you also know that i am still a submissive. The thing is that my submission is more to find someone for whom my lustful desires will allow me to surrender myself so as to serve my Owner in any and all manners that will bring Her pleasure. i crave seduction and sensuality to capture me and a kinky perversion with endless imagination to forever stimulate me. So if i am to allow my heart to guide me, there is no telling what will bring that special Lady pleasure. Should that be to become a pain slut or just to be a good slave when punished, it is something that i need to know about.
In your blog i have found a lady who will go to any length to pursue her goals in life and be that ultimate pain slut for a demanding Master. Strangely that not only brings me empathy for you since you do have a strong lust for your passion. But i also have sympathy since i would rather see you being tenderly cared for my a loving slave than enslaved by a sadistic Master.
Someday i pray that my desires, lusts, fantasies and kink will have fertile grounds to blossom, and until then your life is proof that it is possible.
Paul {SML}
Tina,
I guess I am one of those regular visitors to your blog which you write about. I really enjoy the way your writing captures the complex emotions associated with receiving stict discipline, especially when it is at our own hands - the dread of the pain, the thrill of taking it, the satisfaction afterwards, the deep down need which drives us and the sense of wonder - why do we do it? You describe these so accurately and erotically, especially as, I assume, Englsh is not your first language.
I got "hooked" on CP at boarding school at the age of 11 and started self spanking then. I've had quite a few disciplinarians over the years but, for a variety of practical and emotional raasons,I've come to prefer disciplining myself, albeit under the direction or supervision of a remote tutor. I'm still fixated by school-type scenes and so my punishments include lengthy corner time, written punishments and sometimes physical exercise as well as corporal punishment, which. of course, is a lot more severe than anyone got at school.
I don't need discipline very often - every 6 weeks or so is enough for me - so I don't have your problem of my bottom and thighs getting toughened and less sensitive to pain. I received a 4 hour detention two days ago, which has left my bottom very sore (I'm sitting on an extra cushion to type this) with some marks which will last at least a week, which will be a challenge. I'm off to the gym in a minute and can cope with hiding the marks in the shower but I've got lots on my thighs which show below my shorts!
Self-spankers are often scorned by other spanking enthusiasts, which is why I appreciate your blog (and have set up my own Yahoo Group (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/selfimposeddiscipline/), although that is not very active at prsent.
So please keep up your amazing posts. (I love the photo which accompanies your latest one -are their any more in this series?)
William
Tina, I want you to lie on your back naked with your knees to your chest so that your buttocks are open.
I want you to put a cigarette out on the skin between your buttocks close to your anus on the right side, do it slowly with no cheating. Then, do the same on the left side of your anus.
You will think of me very often as you walk, sit, bath, shit and get whipped on your wounds by your Master.
I may post with further instructions on keeping the area clean during the healing process using salt and rubbing alcohol.
tyler: Well it isn't easy, you know. Sometimes I was ready to give up, as I thought I would never find my match. But I did and I think you will find your way, too. Just don't give up. Walk don't run....
slut paul: You seem to know a great deal about what your needs are, too. As for me being enslaved by a sadistic Master, I don't think I could possibly find a more tender, caring and loving man. The thing is we both enjoy this game and can hardly believe that we were lucky enough to find each other.
william boyson: Great to hear that there are also others enjoying self discipline. Yes, sometimes I need it so desperately that I simply cannot wait another minute. But I must stress that my priority is the relationship I have with my Master. Self-discipline is great but will never come near the ecstacy I experience when we play together.
anonymous: Welcome here and thank you for a very exciting proposition. I have burnt myself with cigarettes before but not in this spot and I would very much like to try. Do you have a blog of your own? Please tell me more about your ideas.
Hi Tina.
I thought I'd post something to tell you that not only people who themselves enjoy punishment in different forms read your blog. Not that I thought this was your understanding,I just wanted to say.
I am a "normal" girl of 16, living in a rather small town in Sweden. I do not share your enthusiasm and passion for punishment and pain, and I sincerely don't find it turning me on in any way. I simply read your blog because I think you are a good writer. You keep me reading by posting such passionate texts. I also find it interesting that such a "normal" woman/girl can have such a different passion in life than one would think, just seeing her walking down the street, as it seems. You have taught me that you don't have to be specifically "weird" to have a passion for something different. I know many people who would think your blog is disgusting, weird, and not at all in their taste. I also know many people who would clearly assure me and others that such a person as you, Tina, must be sick in some way caused by a childhood trauma or a lack of self-esteem. Reading your blog I have learned otherwise, and I thank you for that.
I respect and understand that you want to remain anonymous, but from what I've seen we have gotten to find out little or nothing at all about you, so I just wanted to ask how old you are and where you live? In which country, that is.
I would also like to exchange links as you said, if you want to. Take care Tina, and let Master take care of you!
Hugs, Amanda.
amanda: Thanks for your kind words. Actually I'm not so far from you (Stockholm, Sweden) and I am Swedish, too, 40yo. Just wondering how on earth you found my blog as it's obviously not exactly your cup of tea?
Take care.
I've been here before & I'll be back.
I'd love to give you a spanking (w/o the stripes)..Just a good, old fashioned, on the bare.
You know me, I'm sure.
Good to see your blog again.
Cheers!
x, adam.
Tina, be careful with those cigarettes! They will leave ugly marks. Don't do it.
I'll rather help you with those switches. What do you prefer, in spring: hazel? birch? rowan?
I am a middle aged very experienced disciplinarian living not too far away.
Now I'll look around to see if you've got a 'contact' link on your blog. Hejdå.
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